So as i think back on the last few days it makes me sad. i mean school starts in like a little more then 3 weeks. yes i should be excited since it is my senior year, but i start thinking about my life and how i have no idea what i want to do with it, or what direction to even go. I can feel the headaches starting to arise from all the stress. Band camp starts next monday and tennis camp starts the following week and then BAM! senior year begins. I'm just getting this crazy feeling like im already in way over my head. First, the mother says i must choose the college i want to attend by the first day of school. Second, I made A.P English and it is required that i read 3 books and keep a journal. well that hasnt even began. which means i have basically a week to read 3 freakin books. Plus the mother is also pressing me from sunrise to sunset about what major i want. how many times can i tell you 'i dont know!!' This just brings me back to like freshman year when i overloaded on all the classes and work and had headaches which caused me to go into the hospital uh yeah..dont wanna relive that thanks! It just makes all the confusion in my life even more confusing...

But now that i told you about how screwed i am, i thought id tell you about my crazy weekend. Friday i went to my lovely christines house where michelle met us. We then attended Midnight Madness at rec station!! (oh yeah nicole!!) we all decided at 1 a.m that we were hungry and drove to wendy's where we were introduced to a crazy guy!
re-enactment:
Christine: uh yeah i dont think they are open guys. are they open?
Man: uh no were closed. IM just kidding yes we are..my pleasure waiting on you!

umm yeah crazy people at 1 a.m. so anyways we pull into a parking space next to the only car in the place and who happens to be in the car?? NATALIE!! we had a moment lol so then we went back to christines where we watched "Fallen" and went to bed at 3:30.

Saturday we woke up at 9:30 and at 12:00 i went shopping with my dad who is in town. I went to work and then somehow pulled off a miracle and went to renayes house for our carmike cinema sleepover! heck yes. crazy times with perna, chuck, brad and carmen (who by the way does not work at the theatre lol). Andrea and myself stayed up allllll night while the others probably got about a total of 2 hours of sleep.

Well i had to leave at 9 to go to church so i was pretty tired. I went to my grandmas to eat lunch and went to rec station again with Suzanne and her lil bro mason. This time we saw nicole again and greg too. we all had a nice lil chat and i think i might have gotten some sun on my arms lol. Now im writing this before i head into another night at work. blahh

As for the other confusing part of my life, seems to be looking good. Oh! update. i'm so over you. and only a few people know what im talking about but seriously. I cant even imagine if we would have went out bc my life would have sucked bc your an ass. I used to pray to god to give me a sign to see if we would ever like be more then whatever we are and i finally realized hes been sending me signs and i've been ignoring them. But i finally saw the sign, yes i realize i just quoted ace of base, your not what i need right now. And instead of being upset by this, im actually happy. because God showed me something unexpected and i cant believe something good might be happening to me lol. Lets hope i just dont mess this up.

Jena just called me and as we are about to hang up she says "see ya at work". and it hit me, oh my gosh soon she wont be there and natalie, steve, zach, vanaessa, whitney, brad. And again leave it to Jena to make me cry!! But things will be good soon. i just need to close my eyes and take a leap of faith...

bye for now.